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The Fantail

In nautical terms the fantail is the furthest aft part of the main deck of a warship, sort of the 'back porch', where Sailors off watch go to grab a cup of coffee, smoke a cigarette, tell sea stories, or share a ribald joke.

Members: 15
Latest Activity: Jan 3, 2016

WHAT'S THE FANTAIL?

If you look up "fantail" in your Funk and Wagnalls you'll find it defined something like "An Australian or Oriental flycatcher (genus Rhipidura) having fan-shaped tail feathers."

Funk and Wagnall's don't have a clue!

On the other hand, if you were a tin-can Sailor (prize to the first non-Sailor who correctly tells us what a "tin-can Sailor" is) you'd immediately envision a picture sorta like the one above.

In nautical terms the fantail is the furthest aft part of the main deck of a warship, sort of the 'back porch', where Sailors off watch go to grab a cup of coffee, smoke a cigarette, tell sea stories (what's the difference between a sea story and a fairy tale?), discuss the next liberty port, brag about the gal they met in the last liberty port, or tell their buddies what they're going to do about the guy who caused their girl-next-door to send them a "Dear John". It's where a snipe goes to get a breath of fresh air after a long watch in the engineroom, or where a young Ensign on his first sea cruise goes to watch God's sunset as no landlubber ever saw one and maybe be lucky enough to see the "green flash". It's where a crusty old Chief takes a wayward Seaman Deuce for a private a$$ chewing away from his mates in the workspace, and it's where the Skipper musters "all hands not actually on watch" to publicly commend the crew for all the hard work that went into their ship earning the squadron battle efficiency "E" for the 3rh consecutive year.

I think that we ought to have a "fantail" here on Navy Dads, so I've started one. It will be an informal place, free of political correctness, with maybe sometimes salty (but never crude-just-to-be-crude or offensive) language, and like the fantail of a ship, a place to "be ourselves".

Now, anyone have a spare smoke? --- I seem to be fresh out

Discussion Forum

Bastard!

Started by Hans, The Old Salt. Last reply by no1ref Sep 23, 2014. 2 Replies

Comment Wall

Comment

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Comment by NavyDads Admin (Paul) on February 10, 2012 at 11:07am

Another touching "teacher story"!!!!

 

The Marine Pilot

The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment:  Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.  The next day, the kids came back and, one by one, began to tell their stories. 

There were all the regular types of stuff:  Spilled milk and pennies saved.  But then the teacher realized, much to her dismay, that only Janie was left. 

"Janie, do you have a story to share?" 

'Yes ma'am.  My daddy told me a story about my Mommy.  She was a Marine pilot in Desert Storm, and her plane got hit.  She had to bail out over enemy territory, and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol, and a survival knife. 




She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn't break, and then she parachuted right into the middle of 20 Iraqi troops. She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke, and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands." 

''Good Heavens,' said the horrified teacher.  What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story?" 

"Don't
MESS  with Mommy when she's been drinking."     

I love these touching stories!

 

Comment by NavyDads Admin (Paul) on August 28, 2011 at 10:20pm

A former Sergeant, having served his time with the Marine Corps, took a new job as a school teacher, but just before the school year started he injured his back.

 

He was required to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. Fortunately, the cast fit under his shirt and wasn't

noticeable.

 

On the first day of class, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in the school. The smart ass punks, having already heard the new teacher was a former Marine, were leery of him and decided to see how tough he really was, before trying any pranks.

 

Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, the new teacher opened the window wide and sat down at his desk.

When a strong breeze made his tie flap, he picked up a stapler and promptly stapled the tie to his chest.

 

... Dead silence...

He had no trouble with discipline all year.

Comment by Dick on March 21, 2011 at 8:34am
Great pictures.  The aircraft look so graceful yet so lethal at the same time.  What a combination.  Say your prayers now cause things are about to change.
Comment by NavyDads Admin (Paul) on March 17, 2011 at 1:18pm
Comment by Todd J on January 1, 2011 at 10:35am
Great stuff Paul!
Comment by NavyDads Admin (Paul) on January 1, 2011 at 10:02am

This may not be directly related to Navy matters, but as admins we do get a number of support questions about running NavyDads on mobile devices....in particular I thought this might address some Blackberry tech support issues:

 

 

 

Comment by Todd J on November 7, 2010 at 10:24am
Our son is officially assigned to the USS Mason DDG-87. I have Dad's Tin Can Sailor's cap ready for him when he comes home before deployment.
Comment by Hans, The Old Salt on August 31, 2010 at 7:37pm
Congrats, Todd. Real Sailors have the letters "DD" and a hull number in their mailing address!
Comment by Todd J on August 31, 2010 at 7:25pm
My Dad was a "Tin Can Sailor" andit looks my son will be based on his verbal orders.
Comment by NavyDads Admin (Paul) on January 15, 2010 at 12:05pm
Military Wit and "Wisdom"









--------------------------------------------------------------------------------






"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you
least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of
your unit."
- Army's magazine of preventive maintenance.
---------------------------------------------------
"Aim towards the Enemy"
- Instructions printed on U.S. Rocket Launcher
---------------------------------------------------
"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend.."
- U.S. Marine Corps
---------------------------------------------------
"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are
guaranteed always to hit the ground."
- USAF Ammo Troop
---------------------------------------------------
"If the Enemy is in range, so are you."
- Infantry Journal
---------------------------------------------------
"It is generally inadvisable to eject over the area you just bombed"
- U.S. Air Force Manual
---------------------------------------------------
"Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never
encountered automatic weapons."
- General MacArthur
---------------------------------------------------
"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo."
- Infantry Journal
------------------------ -- -------------------------
"You, you, and you. Panic. The rest of you come with me."
- U.S. Marine Gunnery Sgt. (Mgysgt5)
----------------------------------------------------
"Tracers work both ways."
- U.S. Army Ordnance
----------------------------------------------------
"Five second fuses only last three seconds"
- Infantry Journal
----------------------------------------------------
"Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last, and don't ever
volunteer to do anything.."
- U.S. Navy Swabbie
----------------------------------------------------
"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."
- David Hackworth
-----------------------------------------------------
"If your attack is going too well, you're walking into an ambush."
- Infantry Journal
-----------------------------------------------------
"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection."
- Joe Gay
------------------------------------------------------
"Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once."
- unknown
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"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do."
- Unknown Marine Recruit
-------------------------------------------------------
"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
-------------------------------------------------------
"If you see a bomb technician running, follow him and try to keep up."
- USAF Ammo Troop
-------------------------------------------------------
"You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3."
- Paul F. Crickmore (test pilot)
-------------------------------------------------------
"The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire."
-------------------------------------------------------
"Blue water Navy truism: There are more planes in the ocean than
submarines in the sky."
- From an old carrier sailor
------------------------------------------------------
"If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it's probably a
helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe."
-------------------------------------------------------
"When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane, you always have
enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash."
-------------------------------------------------------
"Without munitions, the USAF would be just another expensive flying club."
-------------------------------------------------------
"What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If
a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If ATC screws up....The pilot
dies."
-------------------------------------------------------
"Never trade luck for skill."
-------------------------------------------------------
The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in aviation
are: "Why is it doing that?", "Where are we?" And "Oh S...!"
------------------------------------------------------
"Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers."
-------------------------------------------------------
"Airspeed, altitude and brains. Two are always needed to complete the
flight successfully."
-------------------------------------------------------
"Mankind has a perfect record in aviation; we've never left one up there!"
-------------------------------------------------------
"Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight bag to
store dead batteries."
-------------------------------------------------------
"Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a
person on the ground who is incapable of understanding or doing
anything about it."
--------------------------------------------------------
"The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can just barely
kill you."
- Attributed to Max Stanley (Northrop test pilot)
--------------------------------------------------------
"A pilot who doesn't have any fear probably isn't flying his plane to
its maximum."
- Jon McBride, astronaut
--------------------------------------------------------
"If you're faced with a forced landing, fly the thing as far into the
crash as possible."
- Bob Hoover (renowned aerobatic and test pilot)
--------------------------------------------------------
"Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver than you."
-------------------------------------------------------
"There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime."
- Sign over squadron ops desk at Davis-Monthan AFB, AZ, 1970
---------------------------------------------------------
"If something hasn't broken on your helicopter, it's about to."
--------------------------------------------------------
Basic Flying Rules: "Try to stay in the middle of the air. Do not go
near the edges of it. The edges of the air can be recognized by the
appearance of ground, buildings, sea, trees and interstellar space.
It is much more difficult to fly there."
-------------------------------------------------------
"You know that your landing gear is up and locked when it takes full
power to taxi to the terminal."
--------------------------------------------------------------
As the test pilot climbs out of the experimental aircraft, having torn
off the wings and tail in the crash landing, the crash truck arrives,
the rescuer sees a bloodied pilot and asks, "What happened?".
The pilot's reply, "I don't know, I just got here myself!"
 

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